SPICE OF LIFE: MAID VERSUS WIFE, THEY BRING YOU STRIFE
This was published in Hindustan Times in 2016.
· Air Cdr Biren Yadav,
HindustanTimes
|
· Updated: Feb
02, 2016 11:22 IST
Amma became our full-time help on our
posting to this town in far east. My wife, a cleanliness freak, had resisted
her employment, as Amma was crude and rustic in both mannerism and turnout. For
us, a working couple with two daughters aged 2 and 6, a maid was a necessity
and Amma was the lone aspirant. In no time, all premonitions of my wife came
true. Amma was egoist, unkempt, short-tempered and hated instructions. Her
style of working, my way or no way, challenged the authority of my wife openly.
Their mutual dislike soon turned into hostility, leading to frequent brawls. On
the other side, Amma was an instant hit with children. They enjoyed each
other’s company singing and dancing throughout the day.
For me, this lovable bond covered up her
other frailties. However the two ladies remained at loggerheads with each
other. Amma contested the general comments of my wife on hygiene, and at the
end of each argument, would pack her stuff furiously, announcing that she was
going back to her
village. I’d jump into the storm,
cajoling her to stay back, fearing that my daughters would be left unattended.
My wife felt slighted and blamed me for
supporting Amma’s theatrics. Fearing marital turbulence, I committed to back my
wife during such sparring. The next clash saw me jump between the two. I faced
Amma, fearing at the prospect of her actually leaving but holding on to my
resolve of supporting my wife. I stuttered something like “... Amma, you are so
elder to all of us... she is like a small child ...I mean... we are so small...
and you need to be mature... you should be guiding her... I mean... guiding us.
You are like a mother and if somebody is childish...” I wasn’t sure of my
wife’s reaction, but as I turned around to face her, her stunned and hurtful
look confirmed my worst fears.
Both fighters retreated to their
respective corners. My wife spoke up only the next day, saying now it was her
turn to pack up and go to her mother, as I have humiliated her by calling her
childish and giving Amma the authority to lecture her. I tried to clarify that
what I meant was that she was young enough to be her daughter and she should
treat her like one. Further infuriated, she raised her voice and said:
“Daughter, my foot! She behaves and treat me as though she is my mother-inlaw.”
Tension prevailed for a few days, only
to return at my belated realisation of her retort. It was now my turn to whine
and cry “I have not liked the manner in which you have dragged my mother into
all this. She is not even here and the comparison is not appreciated.”
Another week gone, Amma was also taken
aback by the silence between us; and she sobered down. We continued with the
services of Amma but soon her newly married son moved in with her in the hope
of finding better prospects in the city. The domestic work was handed over to
the new daughter-inlaw, who was articulate and to my wife’s liking. However
Amma, like a faithful watchdog, continued to supervise the overall security of
our daughters, especially when my wife was not around.
The writer is an air force officer based at
Panchkula
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